Day 2: Funuako Onsen

this is really the only story that NEEDS to be told about today. i wish i was a better story teller. i should really give the rights of this story over to a better writer, someone with comic ability....marni, its all yours.

So the idea that i must experience a traditional public bath while here was first put into my head by my friend (no longer supervisor) tim barr who said; you must visit a public bath while you:re in japan. and i think cool, def. its on the list.

now at this point i am still imagining bathing suits or something. so when i find out no no you first enter a room where you take off all your clothes, i think what?!?! i didn:t know they were naturally segregated. i imagained open baths where people wander in and out. so okay just woman, no bathing suits. got it. you carry a towel to cover your private areas, cool. got it.

i have been looking forward to this all day and even more as the day goes on. i am still sore everywhere from sleeping on the plane, the bus, and from walking and walking. in one of the temples i can only really think that i wish i was travelling with someone i could dupe into rubbing my feet tonight....

so i read up on proper etiquette. i:ll explain so you can know just as much as i did when i enter. i know you take all your clothes off in the first room. i know that in the bath there should be an area where you sit on a bucket or bench and wash yourself before entering the bath. i know i should get a towel to cover myself and that when you get in the bath you put it on your head to stay dry.

i go up to the reception and hand her the 400JPY for the bath she also has me pay for towel and soap. as soon as i recieve this towel i wonder what exactly it will be any good for. it is clearly the size of a small hand towel. i don:t think to far ahead as not to worry about this. i walk in. lots of naked old japanese ladies. something about saggy old ladies makes me feel less modest. i undress. i look at this towel. no one else is covering themselves up. but should i? something about being the token white girl of this affair makes me want to cover up. but if i do, then i:ll have to choose what to cover up and it certaily can:t fit around me so no matter what i:m not really covering much if anything. oh well. i close the locker and take the key.  i remember wondering where do i put the key? i clearly don:t have a pocket for this.

i enter the first room. it has a sink with spigots and a stack of buckets. well i can:t sit here but this must be where i wash myself so i do a little and throw cold water on myself, standing. this feel wrong. but no one is giving me weird looks. this can:t be right. so i decide to enter the baths just to see if there is a place to sit and bathe. sure  enough there is. ooops. i sit on a bucket and bathe. i think a lot of naked butts have sat here. oh well.

i find myself alone in the one outdoor bath. no this is heaven. its a hot springs except you`re naked. what could be better? i am totally relaxed and just about to move to the indoor baths when it dawns on me....the key!!!! ohhhhh no! i left in the sink, i:ll just go get it. nope. not there. oh i left it where i bathed...nope. i:ll look in the sink again. at this point i allow myself to think i just lost the key to where alllll my clothes are. i don:t speak japanese. they don:t speak english. i am naked, and the receptionist is in the lobby. how in the world did i do this?!?!?!

i honestly don:t even allow myself to go thru the scenario more than once because i think i would have had a panic attack. in these kinds of situations i really just go with denial and imagine this didn:t happen.

well i must have looked a little panicked because an old lady gestures what i am looking for, i gesture about the key. she comes up to me and pulls at my hair, oh! i think, the key must have been in the towel and when i put it on my head it got tangled in my hair. but no, no key. all the other old japanese ladies are now interested in me and lost key. lets not forget we     are     alll    naked.  it felt like an hour had gone by since i started lookinh but it probably less than 5 minutes. finally one of the ladies shouts oh! key! and points. oh thank God! i bow and bow to all of them and the first lady shows me how to use the hairband on the key to fasten to my pony tail.

so thats where you put the key.