Believe the Path

So this morning i hopped on a plane to ishigaki island, part of the. yaeyama islands, the southernmost island chain in japan. ishigaki is the main island with an airport and a small city, it is considered the most developed. i am also planning to visit iriomote island, which is covered 90% by jungle and guidebooks keep referring to it as "Japan`s last frontier" and taketomi island which has one road, uses water buffalo for primary transportation and has generally preserved the traditional Ryuku cultre. Relatively, okinawa has not been part of Japan that long, which is why its culture and a visit here is considered so unique.

i was picked up my the owner of the guesthouse. when we arranged this i asked how i would find him at the airport. he replied saying it would really not be a problem. he must have thought this was a very funny question since the airport is tiny and i was the only white person there. ya no trouble finding me. he is korean and his wife is japanese. they met at a guesthouse in australia and ever since he has dreamed of running a guesthose in a beautiful place. now they run this guest house and live here with their two boys, 2 & 5. I told him about my family here in okinawa on our way and when we arrived he noticed the picture of VInce & Becca in my wallet. he exclaimed and looked hard at the photo chuckling,  "they are so cute............ they are cuter than my boys" he said! haha... not sure you`re allowed to say that but it WAS funny.

he kindly took me to the grocery and showed me around the area in the car and pointed me to the nearest beach. when he was showing me the way on the map he said several times "believe the path" it took me a second to realize what he meant. "it will look like jungle," he said, "but believe the path. it is the right way."  this phrase was in my head my whole walk to the beach. what a wonderful phrase! i wonder how he found that phrase. Believe the path. i won"t draw out a corny comparison to my life journey because i think we call all find the meaning of this phrase on our own but i love it: believe the path. sometimes it doesn't not look like the way you are going could possibly be the right path but believe in it, it will get you to the right place.

practically speaking i was thankful that he described it the way how he did, i was less likely to doubt the path as i passed cows and sugar cane and jungle and suddenly i popped out right on the beach. totally alone. whoa!

it was a beautiful spot even if sadly quite littered. here i am way out in the middle of NOWHERE and plastic bottles are still washing up on the shore?!?! i find a spot, strip down to my bathing suit (its SO warm!), grab my snorkel and plod into the water. i have been talking and talking about how much i want to snorkel. unfortunately i talk big, mostly for myself, hoping i can forget how terribly afraid of the ocean i am. so even in barely a few feet of water, when i get down to swim, my breath quickens to a panic, i am turning this way and that trying to see everything around me, frightened by my lack of peripheral vision, oh boy! i'm up and out of the water, trying to slow my breathing, now panicked by what i am walking on and feeling far from shore even though the water doesn't cover my knees. i'd like to think i'd do better with someone to hold my hand but talk to anyone who's been in the ocean with me---thats not an easy job. 

i am not too hard on myself tho. going under water (epecially outside a pool) has caused me to panic since i was a kid. i almost failed many a swim test for this reason. i now recal screaming when my dad tried to take me snorkeling in aruba and tried to put me down... you know in the water. being in water, oceans in particular is legitimately my worst fear and one i have to actually face pretty often. i can now look at my dad and i's surf lesson in california as not only the scariest thing i ever done but also an accomplishment i can really be proud of. not only did like 5 waves legitatmely kick my butt but i was also constantly holding back a panic attack just from being out in the ocean.

i get back to shore and decide i need to take this a little slower and maybe lower my expectations a little. i have always felt happy and safe on the coast, sifting for shells and watching little creatures in the sand. i find so many beautiful little shells and some big ones too. this is nice. i lay out my towel and decide to do some sun salutations for courage. it works. this time i put my sandals back on. i feel safer when i don:t have to touch the bottom with my bare foot. i stroll through the water for a long time, getting comfortable wherever i am, just walking. finally i see some tiny little blue fish under the water. i decide to try or maybe create a new technique. since i feel so comfortable standing in the water, i stick my butt in the area, plunge my head under and turn my head side ways to look at my little blue friends. this is nice if not uncomfortable but is satisfying enough and doesn't make my heart accelerate.  i walk around some more using my new snorkeling technique. the most swimming i did was to plop onto my stomach, knees practically to my chest but allowing my feet to float to the surface, arms at my side in chicken wing position, kinda swirling my hands like a guppies' fins. yep.

but i am happy and not scared so who cares how incredibly silly i must look. i search for and gather shells and lie on the warm beach and wak in the warm water until mid afternoon. i walk east to the bay and then west to Skuji beach (pronounced scoogie, which makes me smile every time i say it). i wish someone could have taken my picture here because it would have looked like i was walking on water. it is a beautiful sandy beach with shallow waters enabling you to walk right out in the middle of the ocean, or so it looks, in only a few inches of water. i walked around in this for a long time gathering even more shells, and enjoyed the warn late afternoon air.

tonight i treated myself to my second trip to an actual restraunt while travelling in japan. it seemed like a good place to sample local food since there are some cheap restraunts nearby and no conveinient stores to eat from. i ordered a noodle dish with vegetables and pork and it was so good (a surprise!). i sat alone (i mean the only one there) making notes in "The Gutsy Women travel guide" so it will be ready to mail to my friend Priscilla, while justin timberlake played in the background.

tomorrow i am going to explore more beaches and hit some of the main observations points on the north of the island.

hope i can keep believing the path, so far its been a good one.

"Take this time to go into any other poses your body needs"

This is what one of the yoga instructors says at the end of each of her classes.  But when she asks this though she already has us lying in corpse pose. what other pose does my body need? really? i'm already in it. my body needs corpse pose. its the one place where i feel like, hey, i could meditate like this.

I've been going to as many free yoga classes as possible while I am here. i love it. how can you not love a form of exercise that you can keep your eyes closed during the whole time if you wanted to? how can you not love a form of exercise that enourages you to find strength in your breathing and feel the energy and your body and you can ACTUALLY feel the energy go int your arms so that you can balance in Crow.

Yesterday I made my second bus trip to Naha. There is something about finding your way somewhere (and back, this is important!) that is so satisfying. I think I shocked and maybe inspired a few people on base with my getting on a bus to go to Naha. This second trip was really nice, I found a better route that got me there much faster and a little cheaper too. I got a little anxious when the bus started turning off the main highway and i could no longer be quite certain where to get off but then it turned again and i was happy to find myself on the familiar main shopping drag of Naha and got off.

My goal was to find the pottery village that was not far from where I was. I found the road that would take me there according to my map but the road only went right and i needed to go left, so i turned down one of the covered shopping streets. i found myself in an expanisve indoor public market. some of the streets were wide but i also wandered down a few smaller alleyways lined with tiny tiny shops and little restraunts that you'd hardly know were shops and restraunts they were so tiny.

on base I can completely forget I am in Japan let alone on a small island in the middle of the ocean. it felt good to get out into japan.  i really liked the public market. nothing to exciting but a wonderful mix of stores selling tourist junk, antique junk (i found a nice sake cup for 50 yen), cheap everything stores, and vendors selling vegetables and fish heads, complete with little eyes staring at you. i almost stopped to take a picture of this but its harder to be the tourist when you're the only one, so i just took it all in and walked on. i marvelled how familiar all of japans strangeness and eccentricities were becoming. its really such a blessing to be here for two months. long enough for fish heads and squid balls to become common place. this made me happy.

i dipped into a store that was selling lots of inexpensive household, mainly kitchen things to look at the ceramics and other odds and ends. i walked in a started digging through some chopsticks to see if there were any nice ones. this older lady suddenly appears beside me and sits down on a little chair. i assumed she had just come off the street. i have often seen little old ladies, who carry these folding chairs, sit down and take a rest. but there was something about her manner that made me feel like she was keeping an eye on me, so i decided to test my theory, i rounded the corner casually and begin looking at some dishes. sure enough she moves her chair around so she can still see me. i immediately smile and think this is going to make a good story!

it wasn't as exciting as i hope but i certainly kept her busy, i wandered around the whole store. and each time i was out of sight, i'd soon here the creak of her chair as she plopped down on it nearby. it was making me smile so much i thought i'd burst out laughing, i was really afraid i would do this as i passed her with a nod, trying so hard to be unphased by her pursuit. but i just thought it was hysterical that she had to watch me in this way. when i finally picked something up i wanted to buy i made sure to hold it out very publically so she would know i did not intend to slip it down my pants, or whatever she must have expected. it made my shopping experience much more exciting, i loved the whole show!

at this same store i happened upon a big fat kitty, with a sign by it which i am sure said  'Do not pet' but i did anyway and he droolled and i smiled. we shared about 10mins of pure happiness before i moved on. didn't want the lady to think i would snatch the cat.

I really cannot believe i found the pottery village so easily, i had really stopped trying to find it. i took a few random turns and though i would ask someone eventually how to get there. but then i found a sign pointing to a pottery museum and there i found the little pottery street. it was a picturesque street with litterally house after house that had been converted into a shop or studio or both. at first i wasn't sure i really liked the Okinawan pottery, the colors and designs, the ever present Shi Shi Dogs:

I went into shop after shop, everyone uses the same styles and colors and patterns but it is not like in a tourist area where you see that repitition and realize these are mass produced tourist items, they are all handmade and painted, it is simply the style used. but seeing so much of the same things is still somewhat unappealing if you don't like the styles. But soon I found some patterns that I really loved and picked a few pieces. in one shop, and this happens to me often here, my interaction with the shop owner tickled me so much i was just smiling like an idiot about my purchase or maybe just being there, who knows, but i was happy and i hoped i wasn't weirding him out. i love pottery and it was a good thing because after about the 15th shop i just couldn't go into one more. 

i wandered slowly back down the street and through the market and back to the main street looking for bus stop that would take me back to Kadena. while i was waiting for the bus, satisfied by the day, i really took in the change in my mood. Richard from Texas in Eat Pray Love often talks with Elizabeth Gilbert (the author) about how she has the power to determine her feelings. she is kind of shocked and awed by this notion, and i think it is easy to forget. i am reminded when i see a little kid having a melt down. and i remember what that felt like when I was upset about something and I just wanted the whole world (or at least my parents) to know that I was sad. and i'd cry as long as possible, trying to drag it out. i didn't understand then but i made the choice to feel sad and i did so powerfully. so now sometimes i find myself in a bad mood and its right there where I have the choice to embrace the bad mood because i want the whole world to know or to smile and shake it off. and its a really great feeling when i choose to smile.

i had been in a bit of a funk off and on most of the week for no particular reason, which is always so irritating because then I start searching for a reason and well that just pushes me deeper into the funk. but this funk lifted so easily yesterday, which felt good. i hopped on the bus and settled comfortably in for the ride. i even pulled out my ipod to listen to music for the first time since i've been in japan. i was all smiles on the bus, it had been a really really nice day. i was filled up with smiley happiness and the music lifted me up even higher.

on my way home, i picked up Vince (3yrs)  and he "helped" me walk the bike i had ridden all the way back. we went home and enjoyed a lovely hour. this is the time he likes me around the most and i love it. i was sitting behind him at the computer while he had a snack and we started playing a game. he does this all the time where he'll say "Cousin megan i can't see you" (like if i'm in the bathroom or the kitchen or something) so we played this for awhile and i said i love you, and he said i love you too and i said thanks (because he says this sometimes) and he said your welcome. and i just felt happy.

then we went and hid under a blanket so the monsters wouldn't see us. definitely a good day.

"Damn you for going to Okinawa!"

So the morning i left Osaka for the airport the guy who worked at my guesthouse remarked that it was getting colder in Osaka and recalled I was heading to Okinawa and actually said, "Damn you for going to Okinawa." i thought this was funny, hearing him curse about the warmer weather i would be enjoying. and i am, thank you very much for those pleasant words of sending.

So i have retaken up my reading of Eat Pray Love since i got here. I will say it was the blessing I expected to have lost the book on my way to Kyoto because I read instead "Kokoro," a Japanese novel by  Natsume Sōseki that was first published in 1914, as I just found out, thank you very much Wikipedia, in serial form in the Japanese newspaper, which would be a neat way of reading it. The book doesn't have chapters and is divided into 3 parts so I had to abandon the traditional way of putting down the book after reading a few chapters. Eat Pray Love is like this really, even if each part is divided into 36 stories, they certianly aren't chapters or neccesarily stopping points. SOOOO anyway, the title of the novel can be translated to mean "The heart of things." Kokoro was a really enjoyable read (even if it was about lonliness, solitude, and suicide) and it was very satisfying to read a Japanese novel while travelling in Japan, i really loved it and also without planning it this way i finished the final pages while landing right on the ground in Okinawa.

So. Having been gone from my blog for a week, with no updates except finally using Google Language Tools to more accurately write my blog title in Japanese, I decided I needed to get back to writing.

I think I am also glad that I took a break from Eat Pray Love one) so i could go about my own adventure without comparing mine to hers constantly and two) so i can enjoy the book now, which i am.

I finished the section on Italy and I am now on to India. While i am aware that her transition from Italy to India was obviously a gazillion times more intense, I have found the shift quite abrubt as well. I went from my own "Italy" (Kyoto) where I could revel in my own desire to enjoy life in the present, give into to pleasure and little indulgences to "India" (the base on Okinawa), where I suddenly feel challenged to, well, be disciplined, create my own habits and rituals that will bring me closer to God, and really put them into practice right now! Which brings me back to thinking about what I will do next in my life that is meaninful and then I am like whoa whoa whoa, "YOU are still in Italy, maybe we don't have to worry about India quuuuiiitee yet." This took the pressure off a little because its true. Elizabeth Gilbert, author of Eat Pray Love, revelled in travel and life in Rome and the indulgence of eating and eating and eating and enjoying life in the present for 3 whole months before she committed to staying in an Ashram. So I will continue to enjoy the aspirations this part of the book is bringing back to me but I will also keep in mind I am still on my trip to "Italy."

And i am certianly having no trouble indulging myself. It is like a dream. literally a dream to puruse lonely planet, find a place i want to go and then start planning the trip. its the best feeling in the world.

i have been trying to figure out what my little Eat Pray Love quest is all about and maybe its this, trying to figure out the balance between this viral travel bug i have inside me (you see it lays dormant sometimes, but when it comes on, it comes on strong) and the beliefs i am most convicted about, the way i dream and desire and believe i should and will live my life (which have a lot more to do with service, sacrfice, and love of others than well.... indulging onself...) so maybe that is my journey and I am still on the first part.

okay off to my first Ikebana class...